Love me like You do

No one could love me like You do. No one could and no one would. Your heart bleeds with love for me. Your eyes they search my very soul. Your hands they reach out to me. Especially when I don’t deserve it the most.

I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve apologized and You took me back. But they don’t outweigh the times I’ve forgotten to apologize altogether. You still love me like You do. I keep running away from You, and getting myself into trouble. And You keep welcoming me back, when I find my way back to You. I find innovative ways of hurting and disappointing You, and You in all Your majestic love cast Your pain aside and tend to my wounds. My actions provoke Your righteous anger, but all You do is heal my broken heart.

How, do You do that? Love me like You do? No one could do that, no matter how much they may think they do. Every time You fix me up, I go and get myself broken again. And all You do is mend me with patience that I cannot comprehend. But that isn’t the only thing I can’t fathom. Why? Why do you love me like You do? And how can I ever repay You for all You’ve done for me?

Project Psalms: Psalm 10

Have you ever felt like you’re praying but your prayers just bounce off the roof and fall back? I’ve been there, multiple times. I pray and cry out to the Lord and all I hear in response is the sound of crickets in the distance. That last bit is probably in my head, you never know. But you know what I mean? When you feel so desperate to hear from the Lord and all you get is silence? When your heart longs for encouragement and you look around and there is nothing encouraging?

It is at times like these that I find it really easy to focus on the situation. Like I can do something about it without divine intervention. Oh, Lord isn’t answering, maybe I should go at it myself. Bad call. Of course I shouldn’t “go at it myself”. I mean, when have I ever succeeded at anything by myself? Without the Lord, I would never have accomplished anything (without messing up quite a bit). Then suddenly, the problem grows in my perception like a mountain and I feel overwhelmed and undersized. I realize I can’t “go at it myself” because this is far bigger a problem than I can handle. But God still isn’t answering, what should I do?!

Desperate times call for desperate measures. I learned very recently the solution to this sort of a situation. The Bible calls God by many names and phrases, one of those being “He who lives within you”. You’ve probably guessed the next bit already. If God is “He who lives within me”, then I must shift my focus from my surrounding and stop looking for answers around me. What I should be doing is take a deep breath and listen to my inner voice. The voice that is God’s and is within me. When I did that, I not only found peace that I wasn’t alone in this, but also found the solution or the steps to a solution.

God is a complex God. We will never be able to understand why we go through certain things and why we feel abandoned. But all I know is that God “never leaves nor forsakes” me. And all I need to do is trust Him, believe that He is Who He says He is and He will do all He says He will. Even in the silence, trust Him.

Project Psalms: Psalm 9

Have you ever felt like you needed victory over a situation? Difficult boss, passive aggressive coworker. A difficult neighbor or family member. A lost child. Desperate financial situation. Uncertain future. Have you felt caught up in a war that you didn’t exactly ask to be in, but find yourself in the center looking for a way to win?

Psalm 9 talks about a God of victories. Whatever the problem, whatever the situation, He is a God that that can overcome anything. The wicked are against you? No problem, the God of victories will fight by your side. Nations are against you? No problemo, the God of Angel Armies is fighting by your side.

But what’s more is that He isn’t a God who just fights those battles with you. He is a God who tends to the post-war situations as well. Shelter and refuge for those who need it, never abandoning them. The hope of the poor, the comfort for the widows and children.

So if you’re in a situation of helplessness, know that the God who is with you not only fights the battles but sees you through later on as well. So he will not just help you while you’re going through stuff, but will hold your hand through the consequences as well. The God of beginning and the End. He will surely see you through to the end.

Project Psalms: Psalm 8

Do you ever think how minuscule you are? Like, in comparison to God’s greatness and majesty. I was reading this Psalm and introspecting and realized that I spend very little time thinking of how great He is, and so much time thinking how involved He is in my life. Reading passages of scripture like this leave me dumbfounded at the fact that I ask the God of all creation to make my bus come on time. Like, seriously. And that’s not even the craziest part! The craziest part is that He answers!

It is the world’s biggest paradox that the Creator and Ruler of all creation (think: magnitude, zoom out into the Milky Way and other galaxies) cares about me getting late to work (think: broken alarm, zoom in to my room at 7:05, where I wake up without an alarm because He woke me up).

The Psalmist so wonderfully put this question out there for us to realize the magnitude of this paradox: Who are we that you would think of us? Mere humans that you would care for us?

Just a reminder, in case you think He is God who sits at His throne judging you: HE CARES! He thinks about you! He feels your pain. His heart aches for you when you get hurt. His eyes are on you.

How is that possible? There are so many millions of people in the world, how can he care and think about every single one of us? Well, He is GOD. Bigger than our perception, bigger than we can imagine. So if it is possible for anyone to watch every single person on this planet, it is Him.

He is always there, by your side. Watching, caring for and loving you. And you know, what’s best about it? He is also GOD! So imagine being cared for and loved by an omniscient God! Wouldn’t you do anything to be on His side too?

Project Psalms: Psalm 7

When I was a wee little child, I was extremely fond of Mowgli (The Jungle Book). I’d wait for it to come on television and sit cross-legged, wide-eyed in front of the world of Bagheera, Baloo and Sher Khan. Sadly, because it doesn’t come on anymore, I took my younger cousin to see the new Jungle Book movie. As we were watching, I think I regressed into the child who sat in front of the television, those many years ago. Wide-eyed and expectant. I knew it would end happily (SPOILER ALERT!) having watched so many episodes as a child but somehow, whenever Mowgli was in trouble, I’d breathe out a silent “No” for him. I am 27 years old, for crying out loud!

It got me thinking: No matter how old or wise we think we are, we are just wee little things in front of the God who made us. He adores it when we come to Him for solutions, or dilemmas or even for help. He wants us to look to Him for answers. I don’t think He’s asking for much, to be honest. Just that we acknowledge that He is the God who has got the whole world in His hands and that He is the only solution to all that we are facing.

I love it when I can be a child in front of the Lord. You know, come to Him for the smallest to the biggest of struggles I go through. I love that I can breathe a prayer to Him about things like financial breakthroughs as well as for the bus to come soon when I’m running late. As far as I can tell, He doesn’t mind. And He has never let me down. I love that we have the freedom to talk to the Lord of the universe in such a way.

 

Panic? Or PANIC!!!

Living in Mumbai, I’ve kinda gotten used to the idea of bomb scares and having to endure extra security checks everywhere we go. Sad, but true. A couple of days ago, I experienced it firsthand. A bomb scare.

I was in the train, travelling to my cousin’s pre-wedding ceremony. Of course, I was reading and whiling away my time in the crowded mess we call a local train. Occasionally, I would look dramatically out of the window, to make me feel like I’m some sort of a highly philosophical person thinking about some very intellectual thing (I was actually thinking about what to eat; I was very hungry, you see). Anyway, in one of those moments when I was looking out of the window, I saw a tiny explosion take place a few meters away from the train while we were halted at a station. I couldn’t help but try to figure out what had actually happened. But before I could satisfy my curiosity, everyone on the train had their panic mode activated and there was a mad scramble for the doors.

They say, fire exposes your priorities. But a bomb scare exposes your inner panic.

Every single person on the train was terrified and screaming to get off the train. I was the last one to get off the train, because I couldn’t make any sense of why people were getting of the bloody train. Then I heard it. The different versions of rumors. There is a bomb on the train. Well, if there was wouldn’t it have gone off already? Why would it have a mini explosion to warn you instead? The train is on fire. This one I thought might be true for a minute. But I looked around and there was no smoke nor did it smell like something was burning. One of the boys sitting on top of the trains got electrocuted. Well then the cable lines would be shot and the train wouldn’t be working, which by now we could see that our train was raring to go. There were more rumors, but I stopped listening. I was looking around the people, instead.

Scared, terrified people. All of them having somewhere to go. All of them having their lives flash before their eyes. All of them holding on to someone they know or even just met. All of them desperate to live a little longer. Of course, they didn’t need to worry because it was only a rumor. But they didn’t know that. By the time we got back onto the train, people were making calls to their loved ones narrating their close call with death. All I did was sit there (because no one would listen to the relatively boring theory of what actually happened) and observe and it got me thinking.

Sometimes, the things we think are attacks on us are actually not attacks at all. We might think that they are going to break us, but they won’t. We might think, This is it. But it isn’t. We might think we are cornered and have no way to go, but that isn’t the case. Sometimes, we hear the voices of those around and panic, when there should be no reason to. Maybe it is time to examine what voices we’re actually listening to. The voice of reason? Or the voice of panic?